I was wandering around in Babies R Us again the other day… not because I particularly needed anything or had anything on the agenda, but just because, I don’t know… it’s where pregnant people are supposed to go?
Like, when you are injured, you go to the hospital.
And when you are pregnant, you go to Babies R Us.
(It’s a primal instinct. Like holding your breath under water.)
Every time I’ve gone there recently, I don’t end up buying anything, I mostly just wander around in the double wide isles and marvel at human society and the fact that there is a warehouse-sized store like this in every city in America that has somehow convinced all of us parents-to-be that we NEED this crap when in reality, we just need a few blankets, some tiny clothes & diapers, and, I suppose, a car seat so you can go places without getting arrested. The rest of that stuff is all FLUFF.
(Fluff that sells itself mostly by preying on our fears.)
(But perhaps that is another rant for another time?)
Anywho, with every pregnancy there has been ONE baby item that I have obsessed over for some reason. I latch onto this one item and research it until I am an expert on all forms and variations of it, and I know who carries it and who doesn’t and who sells it for $1.00 cheaper and why option A is better than option B or C.
With Ezra, it was the crib bedding. (We went with airplanes.)
With Myer, it was the ring sling. (I fell in love with the Maya Wrap.)
With this baby, it has recently been the baby’s coming home outfit.
Do I buy something practical and neutral so a boy OR a girl could wear it? Or do I go crazy and buy a tiny little boy outfit AND a tiny little girl outfit and bring them both to the hospital?
A normal person would just buy one of each and then forget about it. But not me, no siree! I am concerned about the psychological effects that buying a little girl outfit might have upon me if I don’t end up getting to USE it.
A normal person would say “Just give away the outfit that you don’t end up using!” But not me, no siree! I fret about the mental implications and distress that could occur if I have another boy and then give away the girly outfit and then see a friend’s little girl wearing it, causing me to mourn a little on the inside for the girl I didn’t have and then feel guilty about said mourning when I should be rejoicing over a friend’s new baby girl!
Someone needs to just come slap me. I am wearing a hole in my brain.
All of this is just to say, as I was wandering around in Babies R Us the other day, I came upon this little number:
The strawberry cuteness juuuust about did me in. No, really! I think I almost died. I’m pretty sure that my pulse slowed way down and I saw a bright light.
I didn’t buy it, of course, because I had to come home and obsessively obsess about the purchase before I could ever allow myself to bring something pink home with me.
But now I’m thinking that I should just go back and get it. Or at least allow myself to buy SOMETHING girly, just in case? It’s like, just live a little, Emery!
Plus, you never know… maybe allowing myself to buy something pink would flush some of this crazy out of my system!