Self Sabotage.


The heat has zapped my brain and the most creative thought I’ve had all day was, “I wonder if those weeds out front will scorch and die on their own, or if I’ll have to eventually haul myself outside to pluck them manually?”

I am admittedly NOT a Summer time person, and the heat-induced lock down syndrome is starting to take it’s toll on my emotional state. The days are filled with TV and air conditioning and attempting to play with Ezra while every fiber of my being is fighting it. There have been many naps on Ezra’s floor whilst in mid-play. Luckily, my boy lets me rest when that happens- for 10 minutes or so.

Then he jumps on me.

I haven’t done anything remotely productive in weeks except for yesterday when I finally cleaned my floors.

It’s hard not to slip into a funk when the sun takes over my life. I start to feel like a caged animal. Meanwhile, my poor husband is outside all day everyday- scaling roofs and painting eaves while the sun is slowly turning his skin a darker color than it has ever known before. Despite the SPF 50.

Frazzled, I am.

And I’m starting to realize that soon and very soon? There will be TWO humans in my care. Say whaaa?!? (Insert mild panic attack here.)

The things that I know would help me are the very things I fight. Planned activity. Staying productive- cleaning, cooking, grocery shopping. Calling friends. GETING DRESSED IN THE MORNINGS. Reading my bible. These are the things that usually help me. These are the things that I do not do. (Self sabotage!)

Instead I laze around and give the sun the evil eye out the window. And wait for the clouds to come rescue me.

Any one know of a cure for the Summer time blues?

18 thoughts on “Self Sabotage.

  1. When you figure it out, let me know. I too have yet to get dressed today and am just in the summer funk.

  2. We moved from Oregon to Texas just about 8 months ago. Oregon summers are pretty mild, and I am used to be active, visiting with neighbors, or just sending the kids out to play for a while. We are on FULL hibernation mode here right now with this heat, and it’s making me positively insane. I honestly want to scream most days. Today we braved the park for about an hour and a half, and we all came home overheated and nauseous. This really stinks!(ps: I’m sure it doesn’t help much, but reading your post helped me out quite a bit! So many people I talk to here say they just love the heat. Whackos, I tell you!)

  3. Thank you for not being a summer person. I, too, am not a summer person, and I feel alone and picked on because everyone else loves summer.

  4. ugh, I’m glad I’m not the only person who dreads summer. don’t get me wrong, I do enjoy a warm day at the beach, or lazy days in the pool, but 98% of the time I end up getting grouchier and grouchier as the summer wears on. And I find I have ZIPPO patience in the summer. everything frazzles me and makes me want to explode. coming from an already impatient person, that is no bueno. oy, fall leaves, you could not come fast enough!

  5. I tell every one I know I have reverse seasonal depression disorder. The temperature rises above 75 and I go into a complete funk. Every thing you listed as self-sabotage is right on for what I need to do to stay on top of it so I encourage you to try. A wise woman once told me to just do one thing. Don’t focus on making the whole day productive but instead get up and choose one thing to do then think about doing another one thing. This has helped me immensely. God has been kind to me here as after we have a couple hot days there is a reprieve of a day like today that was overcast and never rose above 65 degrees. I think he is gentle with me as I am battling PPD…Can’t imagine dealing with both.It will get better. I hope it is sooner rather than later for you:)

  6. i have always loved summer more than any other season by far… until this one… having a little gremlin to entertain inside all day is intense, especially when you’re all knocked up and tired…. lets just say i definitely feel your pain and i have NO summer time blues cures… wish i did…. just clean and clean and clean and clean.. oh and blog and blog… haha…

  7. oh pobrecita! i too feel your pain. the heat sucks every bit of energy out of me and makes me all sleepy. WATER is the only cure I’ve found. jump in a pool or go to a lake, river, etc and post up. Even the hose will do :)

  8. i am strange, I love the summer! WInter, being inside becuase its rainging gets me all grumpy and i get like how you feel now! Summers for me are easy, I let the boys be naked, i put on the spinklers, we watch a mo vie around lunch time, naps at 2, we ride our bikes down to the park or take w alk around the block, go to burger king wer they have a killer play thingy, i go swimming in the pool down the street from our house! All becuase of the sun, now if you and I can just swap for the seasons we would be et ernally happy and active! Im sorry Emery, two is pretty easy, it was for me! Youll be great!

  9. i suffer from those same symptoms of self sabotage.but my naps are in the sun with sunscreen re applied very often because i like the sun and heat.for the summertime blues, when i’m nannying we make our own “juice pop-ohs” in the morning and they’re ready to eat after their afternoon nap. you can google-search to find good homemade popsicle ideas, but since i’m kind of lazy, i do half juice, half water, and a couple spoonfulls of pancake syrup. we bought molds at wal mart.not very time consuming, but it’s fun to look forward to a cool and yummy afternoon treat.and to help the super sluggish feeling, i drink ice water or eat fresh juicy fruits like nectarines or melons.sorry if this shows up multiple times. it kept asking me for the “word verification”…

  10. We go swimming a lot. I don’t always feel like it, but when all 5 start whining and telling me I promised thenI must go.I read my bible when I go to take a shower. The door is locked, I can ignore the knocks and I always feel a little better. At least a chapter or 2.

  11. Trying to catch up on your blog since I had my baby at the end of March. I can’t believe you’re preggers! I’m so excited!! You look wonderful and I miss being pregnant already — so I get to live through you and Stephanie! :)

  12. Ah, I enjoy summer but I too self-sabatoge. I laze around and avoid the very things that might spark some light into the day. When I force myself to do something productive I automatically feel better! Could you commit to something with a friend so that you “have” to do it?

  13. Thanks for this post…I feel the same as you do about summer (as so many more have said). The “just do one thing” idea is something I’ve heard before and it does work (when I can find the motivation to do that just one thing :)You are a very gifted writer – I know I’ve (and many others too, have) said this before, but it struck me again as I read these last two posts. You are an encouragement to me. Thank you :)

leave a comment!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s