Things Have Changed.

And the award for most entertaining Christmas gift goes to… the Rubik’s cube! Jaxon and Chris have figured out how to solve it.
Bonus: now I can say I am married to a genius. Yes!

We’ve got two and a half days left here in Reno. Where have these two months evaporated to?

It’s proven very interesting- spending this much time back at home… for the first month and a half I was missing Oklahoma. But, wouldn’t you know it, just the past two weeks I have been feeling very sad to leave here- to leave our family again.

These two months in Reno have been very emotional and hard and extremely good all at the same time. It has been a total gift to see Ezra get to know his grandparents and aunts and uncles. It’s been an amazing time for my husband and I, as well. We’ve gotten time to ourselves, time with friends, time to wander around in stores together, and time to enjoy meals without the pressure of entertaining a toddler. That’s a big part of why I am sad to leave- it’s been a great (and much needed) breather for Chris and I.

Lots of things have changed since we’ve been here.

For starters, Ezra is now COMPLETELY and totally potty trained. (hallelujah praise the lord on high for He is good.) He is even staying dry at night. (Knock on wood. FEROCIOUSLY.) I haven’t changed a diaper in two weeks, and I still don’t think that the AWESOMENESS of all this AWESOME has sunk in entirely just yet. I mean, think about it… I don’t have to be all up close and intimate with his poop anymore! This is earth-shattering stuff here, people. Completely life changing.

Consequently, Ezra is no longer a small baby child, but more like a young adult that has suddenly moved in in his place. He is hugenormous and the pants that were too long on him when we got here are now just right. When he talks, he doesn’t need a mommy-translator; Anyone can understand him clear as day. Also, he’s opened his own small business. He calls it ‘Ezra’s Toy Store’, but I am working with him on that. I think it needs something catchier… something like ‘Ezra’s All Encompassing Game That You Must Play With Him Non-Stop Or Suffer The Consequences Of Total Toddler Melt-Down.’ Or something like that.

The little dictator.

MoMar suffering the 11th hour of unending store play.

Things have changed with me, as well. I am more acutely aware of my fragility- more convinced than ever that I need to do something for myself. I can’t describe my state in any better word than fragile. Have you ever been in this place? Where every song you hear stings your eyes with tears because you can find some way to relate the lyrics with your fragile state of being? So silly. That’s me the past two weeks. Even the simplest songs get me choked up. And don’t even get me started on Robbie Seay’s new album. WATERWORKS, I tell you. The whole ALBUM is about being fragile but hanging on to future hope. GAH.

Lastly, Chris and I are more confused than ever about the next stage in our life. We have no idea what is on the horizon, but we know a couple of things for sure: We miss our friend Joel like crazy and have said on occasion that we would follow him to the ends of the earth. Heh. We miss our friends in Oklahoma… all my mom friends and dear sweet Jacquie and Crystal and Pete and Charlie and the guys. We miss our amazing neighbors. We miss our community at Bridgeway like nobody’s business. What it all boils down to: We are happy where we are, but we’ve got hopeful eyes fixed on the horizon at the same time. Does any of this make sense? Probably not. I just woke up like, two seconds ago.*

What a bittersweet time this is.

The other small thing that has changed is that there has been talk of trading in THIS:

For something along the lines of THIS:

…in the near future? Maybe? Chris says not to get my hopes up too much, but I’ve already taught Ezra how to say “Dada, I want a bigger car!”, so I think it’s pretty much futile to resist at this point.

Ezra has the fiercest puppy-dog eyes you’ve ever seen in your life. WE’RE DOOOOOMED!

*I wrote this early this morning, but was not able to post it until now because the POWER WENT OFF here at my mom and dad’s house and did not come back on until 1:00PM. I love electricity. The End.

9 thoughts on “Things Have Changed.

  1. Well, life changing trips are….well, just that. Life changing. And yeah. I hear ya, about that whole tearing up at random songs thing. Darn that John Mayer and his songs about growing up! (wanna good cry? listen to “stop this train”. woah mamma!)

  2. i get all emotional and philosophical when i spend a lot of time with my parents (especially if i stay at their house). i think its because i feel stuck between being their child and my own adult. neither role feels full or comfortable so it feels like an identity crisis or something. maybe that’s why you’re feeling so fragile? see how you feel once you’re home and living on your own terms again. i bet you’ll feel much better. i hope so!

  3. Hi there,I stumbled onto you blog after randomly clicking on Les Miserables in someone’s profile.You’ve just inspired me to try potty training. My kid is 2.5 already and I never thought about how wonderful it would be to not have to change a diaper.

  4. Yay Emery, I love the Element! (I don’t know if that was just an example, or the actual car you want). I graduated college in 2003 and bought my own, I call her ‘Ellie.’ It’s the BEST car-stadium seating in the back, seats that fold like no other, and who else has a car that you can hose out? She’s beautiful. But it’s funny how our eyes start looking elsewhere. I have the itch for a Range Rover, until I looked into it and realized we can purchase it or pay off our house $$$$$$~meghan beck from California :)

  5. What a fabulous post.I came through from cre8buzz.I can’t wait to be in the land of the potty trained again *sigh*Fragile, that sounds about right. I’ve been there… I think it’s something that happens when we become moms. Our heart grows 3 sizes bigger and it overflows through our eyes and our mouths and even just comes out our skin. But we’re such better people for it :-)Wonderful Wonderful.

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